Dr. Andrew Solomon, a professor of clinical psychology, offered a talk on depression. In all of his experience, the worst case of a depressed individual was Frank Russakoff. No available treatment was effective except for a monthly electroconvulsive therapy, which left him disoriented for a week, followed by a short period of feeling normal and then relapsing into a deep state of depression, only to receive electroshock again and thus continuing the cycle. His situation was unbearable to the point that he began having suicidal thoughts.
Despite all the failures and setbacks, he heard about an experimental brain surgery, and his optimistic outlook motivated him to try it. Dr. Solomon was impressed by his attitude, and eventually it led to unbelievable results. After the surgery, he began his life again, starting a family, landing a job he loved, and developing a friendship with Dr. Solomon.
The previous example is a nice illustration of how the way someone thinks has an impact on their mental health. Everyone has a set of habitual ways of thinking and perceiving the environment. In the case of Frank, his outlook on life helped him overcome his depression. However, it usually goes hand in hand. Aron Beck, the father of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, observed that people tend to be depressed not necessarily because of what happened to them, but due to their own interpretation of it.
For example, an unpleasant event could be if your boss is in a terrible mood and gives you harsh criticism. One potential response is to acknowledge his/her bad mood and continue with your day or start to worry about his/her performance, jumping quickly to conclusions about his job safety, and overthink it.
Which person is more likely to carry work issues into his/her life?
Have you ever reacted similarly to situations in your life? How did it affect your mood?
There is a list of the top ten most distorted ways of thinking, which can lead to a depressive mood, with real-life examples I have encountered.
1.All-or-Nothing Thinking (Black-and-White Thinking): Viewing situations in extremes as either good or bad, with no middle ground.
Example: “I am either productive and active in my day or unmotivated.”
2.Overgeneralization: Taking one event and seeing it as part of a never-ending pattern of defeat.
Example: “I failed at my exams again. I am not good at it, I will never pass any exam.”
3.Mental Filter: thinking only about the negative aspects of a situation
Example: “I had to give a presentation. I forgot my lines at the end, I ruined my speech.”
4.Disqualifying the Positive: Rejecting positive feedback, information, or experiences.
Example: “They gave me nice feedback, only to protect my feelings. It isn’t good enough.”
5.Jumping to Conclusions: Making negative assumptions without evidence, either by assuming what others think or predicting things will go wrong.
Example: “My friend didn’t text me back in the past days, I did something to bother him.”
6.Catastrophizing: Imagining the worst-case scenario.
Example: “I lost my job, I am not going to find a new one any time soon, I will run out of money, and then I will have no way to pay my rent and will eventually have to leave the house.”
7.Emotional Reasoning: Believing that what you feel is the truth.
Example: “I haven’t felt connected with my partner in the last few days; therefore, the relationship is in trouble.”
8.Should Statements: Having unrealistic rules or expectations for yourself or others.
Example: “I must never make a mistake.”
9.Labeling and Mislabeling: Using negative words to call yourself or others.
Example: “I wanted to wake up early and exercise, but I never do that, I am such an unreliable and lazy person.”
- Personalization: View yourself as the cause of a negative event, even if you are not responsible for it.
Example: “My Mother is sad because she had a fight. I didn’t cheer her up enough; I should have done more.”
It’s so common to view those thinking distortions as normal. It’s like having an invisible filter for such a long time, that eventually it becomes part of you. Though I have seen clients remove the filter and improve their life. Follow these next three steps.
The first step is to recognize and name it. Observe and reflect on your thoughts. For example, spot if you are using a mental filter or emotional reasoning. At the beginning, it can be tough to be aware of them; extra steps can be helpful, such as journaling about your day and reading it afterwards, or practicing meditation. Personally, when I immersed myself in meditation in Thailand, I noticed how quiet my mind became and how much easier it was to observe it. The first time I noticed it, I was guided in a simple body scan meditation, and after I entered a state of deep relaxation. I was less reactive to my thoughts and more able to observe them from a distance in a unique way.
The next step is to challenge this filter. Try to see to what extent it is a reality or a distortion. Think of alternative explanations or counter examples. For example, if your tendency is to jump to conclusions and assume you know what others are thinking of you. Take a pause and ask why you think it; have they expressed it themselves? Is there any reason to believe it? Is there any evidence to suggest otherwise? Imagine this part of you being your own personal detective.
The last step is aiming to replace those distorted ways of thinking with healthier ones that serve your life and well-being. For example, instead of thinking in should statements, where mistakes are not tolerated. A healthier version could be that aiming for improvement is an important goal, and mistakes are part of the learning process.
In the end, the question is to what extent your thinking is supporting you or preventing you from a mentally healthy life. Frank Russakoff would have never been able to rebuild his life if he fell into those thinking distortions, he was one act of catastrophizing away from giving up. Thus, it is essential to learn our own distortions and how to overcome them.
